Captured HeartsLike butterflies on a spider web we are left to die,
Because she holds our captured hearts,
Every second she makes us cry,
She likes to break them all apart!
We burn from despair and grief.
We lose in life our belief,
Though we try to break the seal,
To make our fake dream real!
How from this trap can we break free?
This duty is not on you or me!
It all depends on our muse,
But you know she will refuse.
From East to West we came together,
Under cold and rainy weather,
We are cursed by her looks,
Which no one can show in thousand books.
I broke the curse, but it returned,
From hell to heaven my life it turned!
Though she trapped me in a cage,
“Success” is the play on my stage!
Farewell LoveI am standing in a field full of dying flowers.
I heard that once they used to bloom
And picked up by many lovers,
Until one day they met their doom.
Whispers from my past haunt me,
I followed them to this forsaken land,
Grief and despair instantly found me
And buried my dreams under endless sands.
Farewell, love, we had good times together.
You made my pen lighter than a feather,
Yes, you were unanswered and brought pain,
You saved me from the burning sun and heavy rain.
One day I opened my eyes and my muse was gone,
Again in this World I am left alone!
Without aims and full of doubts I wander around,
Searching for something that cannot be found:
A blooming flower…
I See Her...I see her up in the skies
And I am lost in her blue eyes,
But suddenly she disappears.
No one in the World my cry hears!
I see her near a large stone gate,
It shuts before me for no reason.
There is nothing to do, it is fate.
It’s full of lies and filled with treason.
I see her walking in the park,
I approach her and everything goes dark!
Ah, I am afraid of this the most:
Even in my dreams she is a ghost.
I see her once, I see her twice...
No matter how my heart tries
Her image always from it flies,
And no poems I can write!
Monster of CircumstancesMy poetry is getting old,
Because the World I live in is gray and cold,
To paint it no one in this land is bold,
No prophesies or legends about such people told.
Just looking around the ugly post-soviet city,
The reason why my poetry is not very pretty.
When I gaze at it I am filled with disgust and pity.
Sadness and despair here I learn,
Why do I need from life this degree to earn?
Why do I need to know how to hate?
I already know, alas it is too late!
I lost my love, I lost my sanity,
I want to destroy! Where is my humanity?
It is all consumed by evil and vanity.
My reflection on the mirror is just a fake gimmick,
The monster inside me tries a person to mimic.
I am alone though, no one is helping me understand,
No one is willing to give me a hand.
When I fell for her, I was a little enlightened,
But now by the darkness I am blighted.
My identity piece by piece I have to collect,
But I know, even that I will neglect.
Impossible Crush“Forget your heart, from your feelings get away”,
That is what my mind used to say.
But everything can change in one day,
And its effects can forever stay.
How did I even fall in love?
Was I punished by the God above?
No one has told me the complete truth,
But I just know that I am wasting my youth.
She is never going to see me from far away,
Even if she does, she is going to turn away.
She will laugh if she reads my real name,
I am surrounded by darkness, she is surrounded by fame.
To my dreams I said goodbye from the first time,
But they refuse to leave; they say it is a crime.
Alas, I get farther from every strike of the clock,
Because in this land I am under lock!
WeakWhen I write I send my words to mid air,
My soul God can never again spare,
Because I am useless, I am drowning in despair,
And I cannot fight everything that is unfair.
Just watching the rainy sky does not change our lives,
Just wandering around the World brings no satisfaction,
And I am afraid to take the slightest action,
Because I know that you will send me away.
No matter how I try to write you a letter,
My scribbles are not worthy of your eyes,
Alas, I cannot make them better,
That’s why from you they are disguised.
After everyone had from me their vengeance,
Now came fate’s turn to make the final strike.
Do not yield, my love, fight for your independence,
Before you get in your heart a spike.
Facing Reality“Why do you need fame? Is it the money or is it the power you want?”
“ Love is the only thing I desire. I want to be near her”.
“Love? Ha-ha-ha! You are a fool to think that love can take you to the top”.
“I believe that one day we will meet each other, the only thing I need is recognition”.
“Look, your time is running out, you have not achieved anything significant and there are a lot of people that have better chances than you do. Give up on the idea and live your miserable life”.
“My writings will save me. I believe I will achieve my goals”.
“If you think your worthless pieces will get you somewhere and will change your life, then you are out of your mind. Look at your writings! Just look at them! No one will read them, no one I tell you. Have you forgotten the time when they were denied by literary magazines? Aren’t you tired of seeing “We regretfully inform you…” and so on
ExistenceOur story had ended before it could start,
In your World I am not present, but you took my heart.
It is impossible, it’s not even hard, to meet for us one bright day.
I doubt that I could find to your eyes a way.
Just to exist for you what would I not give!
Alas, my destiny on my every step deceives.
So many twists, so many turns,
But an endless fire inside me burns:
One year ago in times of sorrow,
When I did not see any signs of tomorrow,
You came along and wrecked the past,
Before your beauty it could not last,
With your help I forgot it fast,
What powerful spells you can cast!
That’s why I value you more than my life,
I wish you would always thrive.
Strange FriendshipNever my soul you befriended,
Because you always me offended,
Though I kept and keep our friendship secure,
This is an illness for which I cannot find a cure.
Many mistakes I made, many troubles I got in to,
My dear friend, it was all for you.
I took the blame for your deeds,
I had done everything to meet your needs.
In times when I covered you I almost got busted,
Good thing that my words everyone trusted.
I have never heard a “thank you” in return,
But know that against you I will not turn.
Though my heart was not meant for you,
In my mind for no reason I loved you.
It will be a secret that I’ll forever keep,
Through these moments of my life I am going to leap.
You are a girl with a future that is lost,
I look at you and see that you are a ghost.
You had your chances, now they are gone.
Saving you is my mission and alas, it is undone!